5 to 1 Magic Relationship Ratio

Feed Relationships with Positive Experiences

The Magic Relationship Ratio for stable and happy relationships is 5 positive interactions (or more) for every 1 negative one. (Credit for Research on Magic Ratio: @gottmaninstitute & Robert Levenson)
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It can be surprising to hear this but based on our self-protective negativity bias as humans we tend to focus on the negative for longer periods of time.

That’s why infusing plenty of positive experiences is that much more important.

Happy and stable relationships have 5 positive interactions for every 1 negative one.

Positive Interactions:

• Expressing love and gratitude
• Active and engaged listening
• Playfulness, lightness and fun
• Expressing affection and interest
• Demonstrating they matter
• Empathizing and apologizing

Negative Interactions:

• Being overly critical
• Being defensive and closed off
• Dismissive body language
• Constantly complaining
• Invalidating feelings
• Expressing contempt

Negative interactions are inevitable in relationships but happier relationships balance them out with far more positive interactions.

Because humans have a self-protective bias toward focusing on the negative, we need far more positive interactions than negative ones.

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