Asserting Core Relationship Needs
Challenges in Asking for What We Need
Our core relationship needs — for things like quality time, validation, empathy, variety, an apology, and boundaries — are often challenging to address.
What do we say? How do we assert our needs by making requests, not demands?
Opportunities for Growth
Trauma shatters our lives in so many profound ways.
While it takes tremendous effort to heal, it can also produce some incredible opportunities for growth.
The Perfect Partner
Relationship Satisfaction Characteristics
While we all know by now that the perfect partner doesn’t exist, there ARE some traits that significantly increase our enjoyment in relationships. 💙
Are You an Asker or a Guesser?
Differing Communication Styles
There’s value in asserting our needs both directly and sensitively.
Misunderstandings and hurt feelings happen more easily when someone else is operating from a different way of making requests.
Resentments Are Toxic to Relationships
Repeated experiences of slights and mistreatments that are unresolved build resentment in relationships.
When we address them along the way, they have less power over us and our relationships have a better opportunity to function at their best.
Let Them Misunderstand You
Misunderstandings Are Inevitable
Don’t you hate it when people misunderstand you?
When we recognize that this is inevitable some of the time, and redirect our energy into coming back home to the truth of what we know about ourselves, we re-empower ourselves.
Fake Apologies Create Distance in Relationships
Fake apologies are problematic in multiple ways, including:
Quick Repairs in Relationships
Addressing Conflict Quickly Feeds Relationships
When we’re able to quickly repair conflict in relationships, we can move on to enjoying all that they have to offer.
Leading with Compassion Isn't Easy
Passive-aggressive communication can be extremely frustrating to receive and challenging to address.
Leading with compassion and curiosity allows us the freedom to name it while also not getting hooked in perpetuating this communication style.