Recognizing Signs without Judgment
Recognizing the signs someone is emotionally unavailable frees us up to find the right fit with someone else who is ready for what we want.
We don’t need to pathologize them or us in the process.
We can’t possibly meet ALL of our own needs.
We are ALL interconnected.
Saying No is Essential
One of the essential ways we can set healthier boundaries is by saying no.
Knowing a variety of ways of saying no can help us when it’s especially difficult to do so.
The Grass Isn't Often Greener
With so many options that encourage you to keep looking, it can be challenging to know if you’ve met the right person.
Recognizing when you’ve met the right match gives you the opportunity to more thoroughly enjoy and feed that relationship.
Exploring our Blind Spots
If we want to be in a long term relationship but keep finding ourselves with someone who isn’t available, it’s likely there’s something unconscious going on.
The more we can be curious, instead of judgmental, the more we can look at our blind spots to increase self-awareness about this dynamic and make subsequent changes.
There are some essentials that we deserve to give and receive in relationships that help them function at their best.
Codependency is when we live our lives through over-identifying with others feelings, beliefs, and needs to the point where we lose our sense of self.
Being Proactive is Key
The way we show up in relationships is ultimately what makes them easier.
It takes some upfront proactive work but can save a lot of unnecessary time and drama along the way.
Recognize Signs of Gaslighting
Have you ever had someone question your reality when even the truth was observable and obvious?
This is likely an example of gaslighting where someone else denies the truth and tries to instill doubt in you.
Shorter-Term Relationships Can Be Successful Too
A common misconception about relationships is that the only measure of their success is how long they last.
The Art of Effective Communication
Learning the art of effective communication is key to healthier and more enjoyable relationships.
Part of that process is making simple, understandable and specific requests.
Essential Core Values are Key
No person is 100% compatible with us and doesn't have to be for successful relationships but there are certain things that are crucial to have in common.
Evaluating what are relationship deal breakers versus what are the price of admission can be challenging.
Having essential core values in common are much more important than shared interests and hobbies.
Watch for Red Flags
There are several warning signs that our relationships need work to become healthier, need outside help — couples therapy — or need to end.
What signs show you that it’s no longer working, if it ever did?
Couples Counseling Improves Relationships
Have you ever been curious if couples counseling could improve your relationship? Do you want outside help to create a better relationship or to end your relationship amicably? Whether you’re in a high-conflict or conflict-avoidant relationship, whether you’re interested in rebuilding trust, communicating more effectively, or deepening vulnerability and intimacy with your partner(s), couples counseling with the right therapist and the right conditions, can be very effective.
Becoming a Better Communicator
Most couples come in to therapy interested in improving the way they communicate with each other and resolve conflict. Some couples have high conflict while others are conflict avoidant. In either case, learning to speak more effectively can dramatically improve the health of your relationship(s).
Resolving Conflict Well
Have you ever gotten in an argument with a loved one and regretted things you said or did, after-the-fact? Are you frustrated with how volatile your relationship is at times or conversely, are you avoiding conflict at all costs?