Why do I Attract Toxic People?

Being Curious Instead of Judgmental Of Ourselves

Instead of getting lost in the drama of toxic relationships, it’s a better use of our time to mindfully explore what draws us to them in the first place.

What is it about our past, belief systems, or “secondary gains” that make us ignore red flags and toxic behaviors?

1.  Reminder

There is nothing inherently wrong with you if you keep attracting this type of person into your life.  You are not responsible for toxic people's behavior.

2.  Recreating Patterns

If you had a toxic childhood you may be unconsciously normalizing unhealthy behaviors in your adult relationships.

3.  Belief System

If you've had a history of your emotional needs not being met, you may be carrying the unconscious belief that the needs of others are more important than your own.

4.  Reenforcement

You may be unconsciously drawn to these people as a "repetition compulsion" which highlights areas in your life that need healing.

5.  Red Flags

You may be choosing to ignore red flags and toxic behaviors because you see the good in everyone, at your own expense.

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